How would you like working with your spouse? I can imagine that the answer would range from great to no-way. The fact is that nearly one-third of all business startups are a husband-wife team. This represents a large number of spouses working together to build a business. My wife Cynthia and I have been married for nearly 37 years and our marriage has survived starting and working together in two businesses. While working with a spouse is not for everyone, we are proof that it can be done. There is little formal research on how to make husband-wife startups successful so my wife and I decided to share our four rules for building a business with a spouse and staying married.

Rule 1: There must be agreement on a common set of core values and goals.

This rule applies not only to business but to life in general. Remember that building a business and life in general are intertwined and that is why agreement on values and goals go well beyond the boundaries of business. Fortunately, for us we agree on most things from business practices and politics to child rearing. In addition, building a successful business was a financial and security goal for the family. In other words, we were not just building a business; we were building a secure financial future for the family. The common values gave us a solid foundation on which to build a business and the goal of financial security provided motivation to make the effort and sacrifice necessary to build the business.

Rule 2: Clear roles are important.

Each of us had a role to play in building the business. For example, I usually handled the financial matters and my wife did not get involved. My wife, on the other hand, is an excellent organizer and she handled all organizational details and I did not get involved. It is important that once clear roles are established, each spouse is allowed to play that role without interference from the other.

Rule 3: Make important decisions together unless they are part of the clear role and those decisions should be left to the person assigned the role.

In areas where we have some disagreement, I usually make the final decision. My wife goes along with my decisions because after 37 years she knows that I don’t make decisions for selfish reasons, but for the good of the family and business. I have made mistakes and to her credit, I have never gotten the old - I told you so. This type of arrangement takes much work and trust. I think we have done a good job of both. (Cynthia's comment on this item - ultimately, there are times when someone needs to be in charge. Governance by committee isn't always appropriate. If one feels very strongly about something, the other listens.)

Rule 4: Finally, we do everything as one.

There is no mine or hers. For example, we have only one checking account. There is no such thing as my money or her money there is only our money. We approach working together in business the same way. Even though each has specific roles to play, no role is considered to be more important than another and there is no jealousy. Even if we disagree with each other, we present a unified picture to the world. We really try to practice and the two shall become one.

Will these four rules work for all husband-wife business teams?

I really do not know. I do know that they have worked for us, but people with different personalities and values, and living in different circumstances may find other rules more appropriate. A final note: I am Cynthia (the wife) and I approve this article.